Once you tried drugs, there’s no going back.
Just like once you fall in love, you can’t just let them go.
Or like your first time having sex, you can’t just stop having sex.
Drugs are apart of Nature’s earthly cycle.
Addiction is natural.
Drugs are natural.
My scars are healing, but I’m not.
Let me just taste you, we can fuck later.
My mother has stopped reminding me to take my meds
My father has stopped checking in on me when I’m alone in my room
My therapist has stopped keeping regular appointments
My friends never text me first anymore
I haven’t gotten any better
I won’t say I miss you but I think my mother knows anyway
Listen, if you’re going to leave, that’s fine. and I know you promised you wouldn’t seven months ago while I was crying into your neck but I also know that sometimes it rains even when it’s not supposed to and sometimes boys kiss girls they shouldn’t and we tear flowers out of the ground just to watch them die and things change, so I understand if you’re done, but please, when you’re packing all your old sweaters and books, don’t forget to take all your three AM phone calls, and photographs where we’re smiling so wide it looks like we’ve never known that feeling in the pit of your stomach when someone screams “I don’t love you anymore.” Take back every kiss, every night you fell asleep next to me, every poem I wrote you, every song you sang to me, every “I love you more fight,” every shock I felt in my skin when you brushed against me. I was never scared of ghosts until you left but now I see you everywhere and god if you’re going to kill me please just do it quickly because I see you in everything and it’s making it hard to breathe